You're doing it wrong: how to choose the right type of habits

If you came across this newsletter either from Twitter or scouring the internet you know the importance of habits. The problem is people don’t set the right type of habits. They set goals:

Don't worry it's an easy (and common) mistake to make. You have an immeasurable amount of potential inside of you. This piece of writing is going to give you a secret that will help you unlock your potential by giving you the skill of making the "right" decision every time.

So what is the “right” type of habit?

The "right" type of habit changes you fundamentally, but how?

To understand this let's look at what you are trying to achieve.

You set a habit to reach a goal.

What does every goal have in common?

A goal should make you a better human being.

But, you don’t become a better person by reaching the goal. The growth happens on the journey. It happens in the pursuit of the goal.

Whether you reach the goal or not doesn’t matter, reaching the goal is just a reminder that you have improved. But, as long as you strive and go through the required processes you will become a better human being.

So the “right” type of habit to set is not one that (looks like it) will lead you directly to the goal because once you reach the goal (or not) you will stop doing it, making it just a goal in itself.

The "right" type of habit should become second nature. Its presence whether you continue the action or not should be felt after you have reached your goals. If done correctly it should not matter if you reach the goal, just that you (actually) tried.

Besides becoming a better person some bonuses come with setting and using the "right" type of habits. Two in particular...

The 2 Bonus affects:

• Your freedom increases

• Your luck surface area increases

If you're confused about how all of this works. Let me explain how choosing the "right" types of habits increases freedom, and luck, and then how to set the "right" type of habits.

Freedom through mastery (of self):

Mastery is a never ending process, it’s like climbing an ever-growing mountain.

Don’t let this discourage you.

As you climb you gain benefits that you can take advantage of, a better vantage point is one of them.

The higher up you are the farther and more clearly you can see. You gain clarity and have more data to inform you of what you should do.

This gives you an opportunity that many don’t have…

The opportunity to break free of what society tells you to do. The opportunity to choose what you want based on information others don't have access to.

Here's the thing, you will never be truly free (unless you’re enlightened). There will always be something you're attached to influencing you. There isn’t anything inherently wrong with this. Just something to note.

However, as you climb higher on the mountain of mastery you will become more and more aware of the ties you have and the things that influence you. Allowing you to become more and more free. You see as different 'ties' appear you can choose whether you will allow them to continue to influence you, either in the same way, a different way, or not at all.

There is one other thing that happens in the process...

You gain confidence.

This confidence is backed by competence, and it gives you freedom by giving you the balls to make the choices you want without fear stopping you and it keeps you steadfast by reassuring you that everything will work out.

An important trait to have...

For you might make the “wrong” choice and have to climb back down the mountain to find a different route. Naval talks about how many people don’t want to do this, because it's hard and it's scary and it takes time. But true confidence, one that's built competence gives you the courage to take on these “setbacks” (they aren’t really setbacks, just a necessary part of life) with grace.

To recap the "right" types of habits give you freedom through:

• Clarity

• Confidence

Increasing your luck surface area:

There's the common luck formula:

Luck = Opportunity + Preparation

Preparation is straightforward; Choosing the "right" habits improves your abilities as a human preparing you for when opportunities appear.

Opportunity on the other hand is a little obscure, at first glance it seems like it may be luck based itself. But at closer examination, you realize that you influence opportunity through your actions.

Let’s use a simple example:

Perhaps you want to get better at socializing.

In setting the goal you unlock an infinite amount of choices, now lets look at ones (that seem) to pertain to the goal in mind:

You have the choice to go outside to a mall or coffee shop or anywhere there are people or to sit at home.

The action you decide to go with directly affects your opportunity of socializing. If you decide to stay home your opportunity to socialize is zero. If you go out the opportunity for socialization is now possible

So let's zoom out and look at this on a more macro level:

Opportunity is influenced by action.

The quality of one's actions are influenced by the quality of oneself. In other words, when you're better you make better choices.

The quality of oneself is influenced by the quality of one's habits. The "right" types of habits improve the quality of oneself. The "wrong" type of habit leads to degradation or stagnation of oneself.

Simplified:

Better habits = better person = better choices/actions = better/more opportunity

And as we know better/more opportunity = better/more luck.

How to choose the "right" type of habits:

You may have noticed that I have been putting "" around the word 'right', and there's a reason for that...

There is no definitive "right" type of habit for everyone, it's unique to each person, and the answers are ever-changing.

The "right" type of habit for you comes down to your current vantage point on the mountain of mastery, and the data and competence you have gained while climbing to that height.

Let me explain:

To choose the "right" habits you need a mixture of new and old.

If you only include old stuff (what you're doing now and in the past), you'll stay the same.

If you only include new stuff you're just guessing, it would be like putting your foot wherever while climbing and taking the next step. You may be successful at first, but eventually, you'll fall.

So this is what you do:

1. Pick a belief you have based on the data and competence you (already) have.

2. Look out from your new (current) vantage point and check to see if you still believe it.

3. If you do, create a goal based on the belief. If you don't, start over with a new belief.

4. Pick an action (to become a habit) that you believe will lead you or develop you into a person that will achieve the goal.

5. Repeat steps 2-3 but from the premise that the action you have chosen is the belief you are testing. If you don't believe in it anymore, choose a new action. If you do...

6. Execute the chosen action.

7. Continue to retest the main belief and the actions as you progress.

As you can see any habit can be the "right" type of habit. All it comes down to is believing in the habit. Belief in why you do it, and belief that you are making better decisions. For belief is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Thank you for reading!

If you found value in this post, look out for my next issue coming out in a week.

It will be about building a specific trait/skill that will:

• Improve the quality of your life

• Improve the quality of your character

• Improve what we talked about today by making it easier and more beneficial

You can check out more of my work here

Have a great rest of your week!

- The Babbling Mind