Necessary Challenge: Meaningful Goals for a Fulfilled Life (Part 2)

In the last post, I ended off by teaching you how to vet whether a “small” goal is worth pursuing.

In part 2 we are going to talk about how to set “big” goals…

Recap:

Before we start let's recap the difference between a “small” and “big” goal.

Small:

A finite goal with a tangible result.

Ex. Make $100 online.

Big:

An infinite goal where the only way to succeed is by always being in the arena.

Ex. Writing 100 words every day.

Now that we have that cover let's get into finding your infinite goals.

How to find Meaningful “Big” Goals:

I say goals, but in reality, this is about finding one big goal to aim at that will guide your life forward.

To find your "Big" goal you're going to define two separate things and then merge them.

It all starts with asking:

What does a meaningful life look like to me?

Go on, ask yourself.

Your answer will likely fall under two categories:

• Helping others

• Doing what you love

To live a good life you are going to merge the two.

For…

If you set out to only help others, disregarding your likes, you’ll have a meaningful life. But, there is a good chance you won’t feel fulfilled. This isn’t always the case, but you must realize you are important too, you deserve to do what you love.

If you only do what you love and disregard helping others. You’ll lack meaning and fulfillment, because you may have done what you love, but who will remember that when you’re gone? If there is one human driver it's the need to fit it. Alienating yourself from others is a surefire way to a miserable life.

So you must merge the two.

To do so we must first go deeper into each topic.

We'll do this in 3 steps:

i) Doing what you love

ii) Helping others

iii) Blending them together

If this sounds like a lot don’t worry it’s not hard at all.

It may sound scary because we are talking about a vision for your life, but realize:

• You’re not trapping yourself, at any time you can redirect your vision

• This is a rough vision, you figure most of it out as you go, and you are not writing out your whole life in detail.

A quick note on helping others:

Helping others doesn’t mean you have to become a firefighter or doctor. You can help people by writing short stories that give them a little joy each time they read them. And you don’t have to help everyone, one person is enough.

Doing what you Love:

When I say “doing what you love” I am not talking about experiences like going on vacation, a wedding, or going to the cottage with the boys.

I’m talking about doing what you love on a day-to-day basis.

Your days are your life.

One-off experiences are a very small fraction of your life.

Why wait for those experiences to enjoy yourself?

It’s silly.

Before asking yourself what you love to do…

Ask yourself:

What does my ideal (average) day look like?

If you want a great video on this check out this post by Ryan Holiday:

Continuing…

Remember this is your ideal day, this is going to be how you live the majority of your life…dream big.

A common mistake I see is people try to set an ideal day based on where they are now.

For example:

If you would like to leave your 9-5 job to become a full-time podcaster.

Don’t set your day up like this…

• Wake up at 7:00 A.M.

• Shower/walk/breakfast

• Go to 9-5

• Home time

• Record podcast

• Dinner

• Edit the previous recording

• Bed

This is a rough draft but you get the idea.

Instead, be honest, what do you Actually want your day to look like?

Maybe it’s would look more like this…

• Wake up at 8:00 A.M.

• Shower/walk/breakfast

• Record/research podcast (work)

• Walk

• Lunch

• Reading/YouTube (general consumption)

• Nap

• Record Podcast

• Editing

• Do whatever you want

• Bed

Don’t be afraid to dream big.

Don’t worry about going into detail. You don’t have to plan things out to the minute and you don’t have to say what each “slot” of time will be filled with. We will go deeper into that in a second.

In the example above I assumed the person wanted to be a podcaster, a more general example would be:

• Wake up at a time you enjoy

• Morning routine

• Work until lunch

• Eat/take a break

• Work for a Pomodoro

• Nap/rest

• Finish up work

• Do what you want

• Bedtime

For now, put “work” slots into your ideal day. We will talk about filling those slots in a little.

The second part of doing what you love starts with asking…

What do I love to do?

In the future what would you love to do for “work”?

Another way to ask this is:

“What would I do if money was no object?”

Is it:

• Writing?

• Graphic Design?

• Personal training?

• A mix?

Ask yourself and be honest.

Don’t think because what you want to do isn’t common or isn’t socially approved of you can’t do it.

You live in the age of the internet, anything is possible.

There are people making tens of thousands of dollars each month teaching others how to get better at video games.

You can do what you love.

Now that you’ve (honestly) answered that question we are going to take a quick detour toward helping others, before looping back and blending everything.

Helping others:

Remember you don’t have to be a first responder, doctor, or lawyer to help others.

You can do what you love and help others.

If you do what you love (this does not mean chasing cheap dopamine)...

If you do something that inspires you to get out of bed...

You will naturally come to help others.

Let’s use the podcasting example again:

If you're passionate about podcasting, your enthusiasm will flow into your episodes…

You will talk about your interests and you will stay true to yourself.

You'll be providing value to people with the same interests as you, who are curious about what YOU have to say.

And the passion in your voice will invite others to learn about your interests...

Maybe health is an interest of yours…you will be helping others lead a healthier life.

Or perhaps comedy is your thing…

Talking about something funny is as valuable because you're making people laugh.

Happiness and health are different topics but as you can see they both provide value to the listener.

There is one thing, regardless of the topic that makes talking about what you love valuable…

You let others know they aren’t alone.

Putting it all together:

By now you have:

• Your ideal day

• What you love to do

• How you will help others

To find your “big” meaningful goal we put it all together.

How?

3 Simple Steps:

i) Zoom in on what you love.

Zoom in.

What are the physical actions of what you love to do?

If it’s podcasting it may be:

• Research

• Recording

• Editing

ii) Take the main actions and fill them into the slots you designated for work in your ideal day.

iii) Seek to live as many days like this as possible.

You now have a vision for your ideal life.

It’s really that simple.

I know what you’re thinking…

“This is nice and all but how do I get from where I am to where I want to be?”

I’ll show you…

How to live your ideal day:

To get from where you are to where you want to be, you need to start living how you want.

What?

Let me explain.

Right now you are comparing where you are (9-5) to where you want to be (time free).

Instead of thinking you have to go straight from your current average day to your ideal average day.

Think about how you can implement parts of your ideal day into your current day.

Take the morning of your ideal day and make it how you live your mornings now. You may have to tweak it a little, perhaps you’ll have to start a little earlier than you’d like.

But, start with supplementing parts of your ideal day.

And more importantly, start with supplementing the actions of what you love to do.

If you want your income to come from writing in the future.

Don’t wait to start writing until some imaginary day.

Start writing now, as you would if it was your job.

Quick note:

There is one more part to getting from where you are to where you want to be.

If you want to live in society you will need to become financially independent. This doesn’t mean you have to become a millionaire, just enough to live as you please.

It’s a bit outside of today's topic, but if you want to start learning how to leverage the internet to do what you love, I recommend you consume all of Dan Koe’s content.

Check out his:

• Twitter

• Blog/newsletter

• YouTube

Wrapping things up:

In summary to live a fulfilled life:

• Set and achieve small meaningful goals.

• Set a big meaningful goal for your life and use it as a guide to keep you pointing in the right direction.

If you set and achieve small meaningful goals and live by your vision you will live a fulfilled life.

That’s all for today.

This post is part 2 of a two-part series.

If you missed Part 1 you can check it out here.

I recommend setting aside 30 minutes to create your Ideal Day and find the actions you will fill it with.

If this brought you value do me (and others) a favour and share this post with others :)

I’ll see you guys in the next issue.

-Babbling Mind